Essay 2

Characteristics

Important Quotes in Favor

Important Quotes Against

Amber

“Or maybe I just wanted it to be true but either way we do end up getting ice cream the next day and he offers to buy mine, which even though I demur because I’m the product of feminists who worked really hard to have the right to buy their own ice cream, the offer means we’re on a real date, right?” (Ziegler, 27).

“Not like there’s something wrong with her. She’s just awkward and I’d like to say I find it cute or something, but really I just feel awkward too, until she’s like “god, I’m so awkward, aren’t I’ […] and she apologizes and laughs in this way that is kinda cute and says, she’s gonna stop eating her ice cream because she’s SO full, and she puts it down, but a minute or two later she picks it up and finishes it anyway” (Ziegler, 28).

“I mean, she’s actually kinda straight up confident except that she can’t look me in the eye and she can’t stop talking” (Ziegler, 28).

“What might have maybe constituted something approaching sex without my one hundred percent consent was that he got a tiny bit rough with me and at first I was into it but then I wasn’t into it anymore and I stood up and was like ‘actually, um’ but he pulled me back and kept going” (Ziegler, 8).

“And then Leslie is like ‘but are you sure you clearly expressed your ‘lack of affirmative consent’? […] for the first time I flash back to the night in question and to the way I felt the next morning, how I wanted to get out of Tom’s room as quickly as humanly possible, and dig a hole and just live there forever, and I’m like ‘I’m sure, Leslie, but thank you for reiterating the gravity of my actions” (Ziegler, 17).

“So when they ask: ‘did this boy do this to you without your consent?’ even though I might not have chosen that exact phrasing it seemed like the honest answer was yes, especially because I was probably too drunk to give any meaningful consent anway -” (Ziegler, 40).

“[….]; he says Amber couldn’t have been conscious when we were… He says he didn’t hear a thing from her” (Ziegler, 40).

“This moment when all of a sudden he was inside me, and it’s not like I expected him to ask my permission but I didn’t expect him not to either. And it hurt and it kept hurting and eventually I just jumped out of bed” (Ziegler, 41).

“You obviously don’t because it happened. I jumped out of bed and you grabbed me, hard, and I was like ‘actually, um’ but you pulled me back into bed and you just…” (Ziegler, 41).

“[….] I had this strong physical impulse to get away from you, I did -” (Ziegler, 41).

“Yeah. I think mostly I just felt really lucky” (Ziegler, 37).

“Why would you have asked him to stop? You were into it at first” (Ziegler, 37).

“So everyone agrees that earlier that night you took your shirt off. That you drank to excess. That you very willingly went back to Tom’s room and got into his bed. Which makes me wonder: why do you think these actions that you admit freely took don’t amount to some kind of tacit consent?” (Ziegler, 40).

Tom

“I’ve never any clue what to do with someone who’s trying to hide how they feel … probably because I am always trying to hide how I feel” (Ziegler, 14)

“He puts his hand on my shoulder and is like ‘call me if you need anything’ and I have the sensation I always have when someone tries to be paternal, which is pretty much uncontrollable rage mixed with deep-seated resentment and I brush his hand off my shoulder as though it was a bug and he flinches like I hit him or something” (Ziegler, 18)

“- I never stepped foot on that stage. I was in the third floor computer room making out with this girl Julia, who was also in the chorus and when we realized we missed the beginning we didn’t know what to do so we just stayed there and later my mom was like ‘you were just so good in that play. And I never told her it wasn’t true” (Ziegler, 18).

“[…] my mom is always like ‘Thomas, you could make some young lady so happy, why do you insist on torturing these women?” (Ziegler, 32).

“What can I say? I like women. That’s not a crime” (Ziegler, 50).

“And then Tom makes his statement. He’s like a.) we were drunk and b.) I would never rape someone” (Ziegler, 20).

“And if she wasn’t into it at some point… well then my body, my brain convinced me she was. I wasn’t knowingly … I didn’t do anything knowingly. I know that” (Ziegler, 37).

“…and then, just to be sure, I say, ‘but she was into it, right?’ And he gives me this look like ‘you’re really gonna ask me that?’ but still he said ‘well, she wasn’t not into it, if that’s what you’re asking.’ [….] And I was relieved” (Ziegler, 38).

“[….] And he says yes, she has lodged a complaint. And I’m like, ‘but that girl is seriously into me’ and he gives me this look like I’m deluded. (A realization). Which I guess I am” (Ziegler, 15).

“No, I don’t remember what she said or if she said anything but yeah, she probably didn’t say yes” (Ziegler, 37).

“So maybe I knew. Maybe I knew. That she wasn’t… And that’s the… That’s the thing that I…I mean, I thought…Deep down, I thought I was a nice guy” (Ziegler, 44).